1867-04-23: A Moment of Reflection
A Moment of Reflection
Summary: With another year having passed, Emilia spends some time trying to gather her thoughts in the one place that she might chance to have some quiet within her mind.
Date: 1867-04-23
Related: Emilia Stuff

It had taken longer to get away then she had thought it would. Away from Sunsreach. Away from Roseguard. Her plan to come this way after gating back had ended with that first step back in Ironhold, the insistence from Syrn to travel back with her. And Graham returning shortly after her own return to the castle. Emilia knew there was worry there. She did not fault them for it. She had her own worries.

It did not help that They had not fully calmed as usual when she had arrived here, least as much as They ever would. The edge of contentment that was brought in coming here was not fully realized. They were quieter, which did bring relief. But there was still an underlying rage. It had taken everything to keep Them in check in Sunsreach, and even then…there had been the slip. She would not have managed as well as that if it hadn’t been for the lessons the past year.

She had wished to leave sooner..but the Ducal election and then Tiadora’s party. There had not been opening to escape, not without raising questions or causing slight. But then this was perhaps more fitting. Where else had she to go and spend her birthday? Last year Jaren and Raelyn had been needed in the North, this year they had new position and spouses who needed them. And Emilia had this….her dark eyes coming up to meet the black upon black eyes of the Banshee within the circle. But for how much longer?

A sigh came as Emilia’s head settled back against the wall she had sat against. She could have had a party like Tiadora, especially with so many yet in Sunsreach….but to what end? She couldn’t have slipped out from her own party. Friends would have come, but more who simply wished to be around the King’s sister…to play at politics would have found way to come. Or been slighted if they had not been included. But that is what other girls her age were supposed to care about….parties and whom they were seen with, what dresses to wear, what boys they might dance with or have a kiss stolen by. Others her age were trying to earn their spurs or position, worrying about what match their parents might make for them.

They did not have to worry about running a force to protect their lands. To keep said force up to the standards and reputation that they had long ago gained. To expand and learn over the new lands that came now in being a county. Emilia knew she was not the first to end up with such responsibility upon her shoulders early in their years, nor would she be last. Nor was she the first to be targeted as she was now. But who of them had to face the weight of duty with another presence within them? A Shadow trying to take control? How many had she heard tell her that she was unique? That they were impressed by her strength? A sigh came. She knew it was true. And yet, so many times she did not feel like she was strong. She felt weak. Like the tree caught within a raging flood that would soon snap.

So much had changed in the past year. She had met the Last, a true Sidhe. And Clara had been there through it all, she had seen. Through it…Clara had become her spirit sister, as Lon had called her. Her brother had married away, to become King. Her sister now Viscountess with a new Count at her side…one who was open to trying to be a brother to her. She had become Mistress of the Hunt…to the dismay of many. And the news that had come in these past months. What change would this next year bring? She pushed up to her feet and moves over to the iron circle, would either of them be here in another year?

She could feel the Shadow within burble up a little at these thoughts. A small breath was taken as she reached the edge, her eyes having held with those of the Widow as she approached. “<They have decided you are to die. Now that a way is known to make it so. The Queen has decided it to be, and my brother will see it so. He will make true upon his promise. I know not when, and there is nothing I can do.>” Emilia watched the fear surface within those black eyes, it had been a thing that she had not thought possible before. The rage and anger soon took over again as a wail sounded, not that anyone else would hear it.

Fingers lightly traced along the edge of the invisible barrier, Emilia knew where it was. There were times she was certain she could feel it, almost like a heavy fog to be pushed through. One she could easily pass through, yet the fingers that touched upon the other side following her own…were trapped within.

A sigh slipped, she had already lingered too long. She knew even as being here brought her some measure of silence, even if not as much as she had hoped. That She found comfort..well as much as She might ever have any…when Emilia was here. Even if the news she bore was not welcomed. But she should be returning, her fingers briefly pushed through the barrier, touching the luminescent fingertips of the Widow before withdrawing.

As she turned, Emilia paused mid stride as her eyes fell upon the shadow resting in the doorway. She looked upon the figure that cast it for several long moments before eventually speaking, saying simply,”I thought you were out hunting.” With the wolfish grin that came as an answer….

…the evening she thought she was to have had soon turned into the evening she needed to have.

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